Here I write on September first. It's technically Sunday because it is after midnight, however it still feels like Saturday. Anyway, this is my weekend off and the new semester just started Monday. Well, last Thursday my first class opened up, so I began working on school right away. However, my dreadful math class opened Friday officially. So I have spent the last 48 hours doing so much math, crying, feeling depressed, feeling okay, crying, getting angry, feeling stuck, crying again, feeling fine, motivating myself and then repeat. Math has never been my thing, I struggle with it, it gives me anxiety. Last semester I had taken my first refresher math course since 2016 and I had a complete meltdown, I felt off, not like myself and cried in the shower which is obviously very dramatic but It was much needed. I made it through that class with a B. I also distinctly remember me telling myself to shut up now because I would have to repeat this same meltdown episodes next semester with my actual college math class.
So here I am. I went to Office Max today to buy a graphing calculator. It costed way too much money so I'm pissed. I have been so stressed out over this class, I keep breaking out in hives. I had a doctors appointment yesterday which even he mentioned that I am way too stressed. My neck muscles are insanely tight, when I got my massages her hand slipped off from trying to release the tightness. So I've been prescribed a few drugs to help my overall headaches/migraines etc. I'm truly surprised I have gotten one now with this math stress. Anyway, I have noting to say except I felt the need to pop in here and whine about something. So anyway I hope this semester shapes up but I doubt it. I told myself if I pass this math class, I will take a trip to Denver...at this moment I don't think that's going to happen :(
Until next time.
